Obama Made Me Do It : How I Became A Obama Bot

The Obama Journal

untitled (171)  Former McCain supporter reveals how she became a Obama bot.

Loony liberals love to complain that conservatives blame everything on Obama , but that simply is not the case. Everything bad that happens in America is indeed Barack Obama’s fault , and I’ll tell you why. Obama is a known communist , a Muslim , believes in global warming , Darwin’s theory of evolution , does not believe in God , and is a gay sympathizer. Anyone who is a communist , a Muslim , believes in global warming , Darwin’s theory of evolution , does not believe in God , or is gay , or a gay sympathizer , is evil , and cursed by God. It’s a simple fact.

The following story is a perfect example of how evil this tyrannical dictator is. From shredding the constitution , to his blatant support of the Nazi like LGBT movement , this man…

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Was Obama’s Mother A Space Alien?

The Obama Journal

Yes , according to a new , anonymous  source.

    Not long after Barack Obama’s first election into the White House , the Birther movement was born. Claims that he was a foreigner , born in Kenya and therefore not eligible for the presidency. They immediately demanded to see his birth certificate as proof of his citizenship , and when it was eventually produced , they insisted it was genuine , even though it was quickly proven to be a fake , a cheap photo shopped forgery. The most compelling case of forgery came from Alex Jones on his radio program , infowars.

Whether you believe in the Birther claim or not , the question is now irrelevant. Now , according to Mr. Jones , there is more compelling evidence revealing the true origins of Barack Obama. On his radio program , yesterday , Mr. Jones made a startling claim :

“Ladies and gentleman , and fellow patriotic gun loving…

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Obama’s Secret Plot To Assasinate Santa Claus

The Obama Journal

This week Fox News uncovered a secret plot by the president to assassinate Santa Claus , and then nuke the North Pole to cover it up. This is just one of many scandals that have plagued the White House since Obama took office seven years ago.

“This confirms what we’ve known all along ,” said Megan Kelly , who once insisted that Santa is white. “The communist , liberal , atheist plot to undermine , and ultimately destroy Christmas for Christians all over America! They’ve been at it for years because they’re jealous that we have something real to believe in and they don’t. This is their final nail on the coffin , and Christmas will be destroyed forever! Oh God , I think I’m going to faint!”

Fox did not reveal its source for fear it would be ridiculed and harassed by the communist , liberal press , and be accused…

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Black Sabbath , Spiral Architect

More cool lyrics and music from the coolest band in the world …
a song about DNA , life , spirituality …

Sorcerers of madness selling me their time ,
child of God sitting in the sun giving peace of mind ,
fictional seduction on a black snow sky ,
sadness kills the superman , even fathers cry ,
of all the things I value most of all ,
I look inside myself and see my world and know that it is good …
you know that I should.

Superstitious century , didn’t time go slow ,
separating sanity , watching children grow ,
synchronated undertaker , spiral skies ,
silver ships on plasmic oceans in disguise ,
of all the things I value most of all ,
I see my memories and feel their warmth and know that they are good …
you know that I should.

Watching eyes of celluloid tell you how to live ,
metaphoric motor replay , give , give , give ,
laughter , kissing , love is showing me the way ,
spiral city architect , I build , you pay ,
of all the things I value most in life ,
I look upon my earth and feel the warmth and know that it is good …
you know that I should.

Black Sabbath , A National Acrobat

Cool lyrics , and music from the coolest band in the world …

I am the world that hides the universal secret of all time ,
destruction of the empty spaces is my one and only crime ,
I’ve lived a thousand times , I found out what it means to be believed ,
the thoughts and images , the unborn child that never was conceived.

When little worlds collide , I’m trapped inside my embryonic cell ,
and flashing memories are cast into the never-ending well ,
the name that scorns the face , the child that never sees the cause of man ,
the deathly darkness that belies the fate of those who never ran.

You gotta believe , yeah , I’m talking to you ,
well , I know it’s hard for you to know the reasons why ,
and I know you’ll understand more when it’s time to die ,
don’t believe the life you have will be the only one ,
you have to let your body sleep to let your soul live on.

I want you to listen! I’m trying to get through ,
Love has given life to you and now it’s your concern ,
unseen eyes of inner light will make your soul return ,
still I look but not to touch , the seeds of life are sown ,
curtain of the future falls , the secret stays unknown.

Just remember , love is life and hate is living death ,
treat your life for what it’s worth and live for every breath ,
looking back I’ve lived and loved but now I’m wondering ,
here I wait and only guess what this next life will bring , ha! ha!

The Boy Who Farted Too Much

The boy farted in class , causing his teachers and fellow students to laugh ,

he farted between classes on students in the halls ,

he farted in the boy’s room stalls ,

he farted here , he farted there , he farted everywhere ,

he farted during lunch , causing many a stomach to vomit much ,

sitting in crowds , he picked his nose and farted loud ,

he crapped his pants wherever he went , creating quite a scent ,

some people called him Pepe Le Pew ,

and you would too if the boy who farted too much , farted on you.

#pepe-le-pew

The Ballad Of The Buttz , Fartzbillies

Sung to the tune of The Beverly Hillbillies …

Come listen to my story about a man named Buttz , a drunken old skunk everybody called Putz ,
one fine day he was drinkin’ like a fish , when out from the woods come a grinnin’ old witch … granny Fartz , that is , one toothless , stinky old hag.
Now the next thing you know old Buttz has been skunked , he stank so bad he fell into a funk ,
the kinfolk said , ‘Putz , get away from me!’ said ‘The outhouse is where you oughta be!’ so they chased him all the way from Tennessee to Beverly … Hills , that is , cesspools , porno stars.